Happy New Year. Ho Ho Ho.

Hello! Bit late this morning, but I’m not at work, so I got up late. I didn’t blog last week either – I had an awful lot of bear as not only do I celebrate Christmas, it was New Year and my birthday and Arsenal beat Chelsea. I hope everyone had a good time doing whatever it is you do at this time of year. Unless you live in Australia, in which case you can fuck off you sun stealing git. Thanks for the Ashes.

Since I last blogged we’ve taken 7 points from 9 – in those three games I thought we’d scrape by with only 2 points so that was lovely. We comprehensively outplayed Chelsea, ruthlessly taking apart their back line. It was a relief to see us actually win, as the last couple of times we’ve outplayed them they’ve still won. Bye bye hoo doo. Wigan was a bit of a cack result, but if N’Zogbia doesn’t dive and the ref gives us a blatant penalty for handball in that game – then Squillaci’s fantastic finish past his own keeper and 8 changes wouldn’t have stopped us winning. It really was “one of those games”.

As for Birmingham, all that needs to be said is that Lee Bowyer is a stampy wanker. If you’re going to take a tumble after minimal contact and kick the ball at the wall, then you couldn’t wish for anything more than it to hit Bowyers arm and go in the net. Shame it wasn’t chalked down as an OG really. I firmly believe that it wasn’t a free kick – we’d have felt deeply aggrieved if it was given against us, but then Birmingham didn’t do themselves any favours kicking us up in the air every 23 seconds. If you spend 15 minutes kicking people and then someone goes down easily, well it’s like the wolf crying boy – the ref is going to think “ah another kick, punch, pull, stamp”.

The other main talking point, also RVP related, was the “handball”. Again, I think we were lucky – I’ve seen them given and in years of playing amateur football I’ve never tried a defensive header with my arms in the air like that. But hey, maybe that’s what I’ve been doing wrong? What was ludicrous was the comments after the match from the Birmingham camp and fans – remember lads that the week before you equalised against Manchester United and secured a point by your certified giant punching the ball to Bowyer to tap in. Swings and roundabouts, karma, bitches and what goes around etc.

As for Bowyer and the stamp – the FA have contacted the ref for his thoughts and supposedly he will confirm he didn’t see it. Then they’ll likely charge him. If it is deemed a red card offence (it was) then he could be out for 6 matches. Fingers crossed. Hopefully they’ll find him guilty if being a vile cretin and expel him from the human race… 3 goals though in the face of extreme physical provocation, a clean sheet and a solid performance at the back from your man Djourou (clearly first choice now in the absence of Tommy right?) all topped off a great festive period.

Over the last few games, the player who has shone for me though is Alex Song. Imperious against Chelsea, great against Birmingham he seems to be back to his best. Tidy and solid, playing simple passes, breaking down play and still scoring a massive goal against the chavs – long may it continue.

I watched Aston Villa draw against Chelsea yesterday. Aston Villa really are a terrible team – Agbonlahor in particular is clueless. He just runs at defenders, kicks the ball at their legs and then sulks. He’s awful. Like Walcott was when he wasn’t very good. But shitter and not even as fast. So what does that say about Chelsea? 3-3? Anyway you cut it, that is a terrible result against a Villa team playing like 11 cabbages rolling around in the wind. Taking the lead twice whilst also coming from behind, and still only drawing is terrible. This result is akin to our loss at Wigan last season.

In the build up to the game though they showed Drogba and his recent games. They showed his goal against spurs where he kicked it a bit hard at Gomes who volleyed it up and over his head into his own net with his fists. And I suddenly had a thought – if an error prone keeper is the worst thing in football (think Arsenal fans lambasting Almunia/Fabianski) then of all the teams in the land you’d expect to get a new one, of all the managers you’d expect Strokeface Wheeler Dealer ‘Arry to get a better keeper. Why hasn’t he? There aren’t any. This is a man that literally ejaculates when signing a massive cheque. He is a pre-conscience Jerry Maguire. And he can’t find a better keeper than Hilarious Gomes. There’s a point there somewhere, half formed, about it not being easy to just go out and buy a goalkeeper.

But actually – touch wood – Fabianski has been solid. He was hesitant against Chelsea, coming, then stopping and then watching as the ball went in the net, but then he is still young and inexperienced. Wojciech Szczesny has also been solid in his few outings this season – he also looks like he has the massive mental streak that the best keepers do. He’s so aggressive in goal that when there are no shots to save he practices punching crosses by punching the vowels out of his own name. There is no fucking about with this lad. But conversely, that will see him sent off at least once in his career. Meh, as long as it’s because he punches Lee Bowyer’s heads off his shoulders then that will be a good day.

In other Arsenal unrelated news Tony Pulis has made himself out to be even more of a spiteful wanker. This time with added hypocrisy:

4th December 2009 – “Arsene Wenger has made a decision not to shake Mark Hughes’ hand, whether that is right or wrong you’d have to ask him. But personally, whether I like or dislike someone, you have a responsibility to show the right spirit of the game. And whether you disagreed with Mark being outside of his technical area at one stage, in the spirit of the game you should still shake hands. That’s not only for people in the Premier League or Championship, it is also for young teams and young managers to see. You should shake hands, you don’t have to go for a drink afterwards with them for a tittle-tattle.”

But…. 1 year later Pulis decides, with Mark Fucking Hughes no less, not to shake another manager’s hand.

28th December 2010 “He has done it when we played in the League Cup and now I have done it back,” Pulis said. “It’s two Welshmen with a bit of competition. I certainly won’t lose any sleep over it and I’m sure he won’t.”

What a glorious prick.

Happy 2011!

  • devday

    The turnaround in fortune for Fabianski is very positive. With Song held back a little, and Djourou in the back four, we suddenly look relatively solid.

    News I’m hearing today is that Almunia is off and Mannone is back as number 3. Interesting, hey? Szcznesy is officially our number 2. Onwards and upwards!

  • Simon

    When we beat Stoke Arsene should give dickhead Pulis a big bear hug at the final whistle. Keep up the excellent work.

  • Fo

    Happy belated birthday Kieran, hope you had a good one.

    Regarding your article – I think you are right – 7 points
    out of 9 is a good return during this period. If we do make
    it to 10 points out of 12 then even better – but the worst thing is that Man United are making it 12 out of 12!!!

    Hope you have recovered from your hangover!

  • Flamez

    Happy new year guys, great christmas period and a good point haul with it. the league will still be a hard task this year but maybe this team is ready for it, especially if the league cup gives them a thirst for it. hopefully if we get a good first leg result against barca then maybe it can give us an edge for the return at the nou camp aswell.

    On another note the sooner Tommy V is back the better, Djourou is playin fantastic right now and i cant wait to see them work together, maybe thay can form the defensive paring we’ve missed since sol and kolo in 2004.