Down at WOA headquarters, we’ve got our hands on a leaked document from the FA…
Dear The FA,
It has come to my attention that we, down at the Arsenal, have a problem this Sunday which we need to address you about.
We have an injury to our first choice goalkeeper Manuel Almunia, and as a result, he will be unable to play this weekend. Although Arsene did say that he wouldn’t play again this season so that he could try our second choice goalkeeper out, I can assure you that Almunia is injured and it’s not just a made up story by the club to help vindicate the selection of our second choice goalkeeper.
Almunia will therefore not be able to play due to this back injury, groin injury, wrist injury and therefore we have no other choice but to play our reserve keeper, Lukas Fabianski. Behind him, we have no real depth and can only call on youth keeper Vito Mannone. We cannot call on Wojciech Szczesny as he is on loan at Brentford.
I know that the club has played Lukasz Fabianski over ten times this season, but if you have been watching the games or read the match reports, you would understand that he is absolutely pants. Simple tasks like kicking the in a straight line, jumping for the ball in the air and not picking up a back pass elude the stopper and in order to secure the third place, it is essential that we sign an emergency loan goalkeeper for the last game of the season.
This request may seem a little strange considering our youth prospect Vito Mannone has played and also considering Lukasz Fabianski is not injured. However, based on the recent ruling in favour of Man City, we are actually in a worse off position.
Where we only have one youth player in Vito Mannone available to us, Man City did have